Ice Cream Place
June 26, 2014 § Leave a comment
I hear people complain all the time about the Valley and living here and how awful it is, and it always drives me nuts, and I have to stop myself from immediately reiterating Rose’s Condensed Bullet Point List of Why Complaining About Your Hometown Makes You Sound Like a Jerk. (I’ve been working on this thing for years.) But I just realized the number one reason why it bothers me so much, and that reason wasn’t even on the list. Until now.
Look around you, guys, and wake up! Wake up to the fact that when you live here in NEPA, you are never more than about a 5-7 minute drive away from the nearest purveyor of ice cream. This is fantastic. I don’t think everyone understands what a gift they’ve been given. I mean seriously, people. Stop where you are right now and think of the closest ice cream place. Is it within ten minutes? I would guarantee it. Can you walk there? Most likely. You could absolutely ride a bike. And I’m not just talking about a Turkey Hill or a Weis (although Turkey Hill ice cream is phenomenal, especially the fudge ripple). I’m talking a genuine small-town ice cream place, the kind with sprinkles always rolling around the countertop, and garishly colored lights for nighttime, and you can never go there without automatically itching your ankle with your other foot while you stand in line because chances are you’ve got some whopping mosquito bites or at least painful memories of other bites. This kind of ice cream place doesn’t take cards, cash only, and it’s super annoying but you also wouldn’t want it to change because then it would just be a DQ or something like that and not a childhood institution. Bonus points if your favorite ice cream place is within 30 yards of a large and pleasingly cool body of water. You know how I know that I’ve finally grown up? Because I’ve gone back to childhood. The cycle is complete. I used to think that a soft chocolate cone with sprinkles was the most enjoyable thing in the world. Then I turned 21 and realized it was actually a nice glass of white wine. But now? I’m back to soft chocolate. And I’m totally fine with that.